Letter from the Editor: He never tells me to lower my voice

By Courtney Warren

I’m an excited person. I’m excited, colorful, and always ready to participate. I say all of that to say, I have met many people in my life who are uncomfortable being around someone who exudes a lot of excitement, and they are often very quick to try to put out the light. 

What do I mean by that? I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been told “be quiet,” “you’re so loud,” and “bring it down.” I’ve had people call me a “bubblehead.” 

It feels like I’m constantly told to be quiet. But if you’ve ever watched someone who is effervescent like I am be told to be quiet, it’s surprisingly sad. You watch a person go from an active participant in what’s going on around them, someone bringing life to a conversation, someone creative and ready to help in any way, to someone who literally shuts off. It’s like a light switch. 

Throughout my adult life, I’ve learned to not tell my students to “be quiet” when I know it’s something we should absolutely be loud about. Because I know why I’m loud. I’m passionate, I’m excited, and I want to share that excitement with you. I love whatever I’m talking about at the moment, and my loudness is a direct reflection of that love. I’m loud to you because I also love you. When I find out about some amazing thing, the first idea that comes to mind is, “I have to share this with them!” So I do. Loudly. 

Now, all of that to say, I know who I can do this around. I have so many friends who have learned about my excitement, and they tolerate the “yelly” bits of me. I also know the ones who don’t. But, with all of that, there is only one person in my entire life who has never told me to lower my voice. He’s never told me to “bring it in” or considered me less intelligent because I’m excited and jumping. He’s never thought less of me because what I bring to the table is glitter, neon, and laminated labels that are both glittery AND neon. He gets excited simply because I’m excited. When people walk away from me because my excitement is overwhelming, he stays. He stays not out of obligation, not because “he’ll hear it when he gets home,” and not because of any vows he took on our wedding day. He stays because he’s just as excited for me – even though his excitement is at a much lower volume. He has never made me feel lesser than him or as if I should dim myself for others. 

However, he also reminds me to listen, that I have to give room. I have to let others in on the conversation and actively work on allowing others onto the stage. That is so hard; I’m excited! And I want to tell you that I love what you’re talking about! But, oftentimes in doing so, I take the mic right from your hands. Without telling me to lower my voice, he reminds me to give the mic back. 

So, for all of us out there who are constantly told to lower our voices, I hope you find (or have found) someone who turns up your volume. I hope you find someone who lets you put a dinosaur flower bed in the yard. I hope you find someone who charges your mic. And, if you don’t, if you haven’t found that friend or spouse or family member, know that it’s still okay to be loud. It’s okay to show your passion with gusto. And it’s always okay to laminate everything. You’re not a bubblehead. They just haven’t figured that out yet.