CoffeeTime: “NOBODY WANTS TO FEEL BAD ALONE”

The six-year-old insisted he go with Mom to see Aunt Jeanie. Never having visited a rehab facility before, he was quite excited with the prospect of seeing ‘Aunt J’s new home.’ He had heard his mom talking on the phone about the room where his aunt played with balls and colored blocks and got to ride on a special bicycle. That sounded right down his alley, and he couldn’t wait.

When Jaime and Mom opened the door to Aunt J’s room, of course there were no colorful plastic balls being tossed about. No gaily colored bicycle leaning up against the wall, waiting for him. There was only a pale version of his favorite aunt, lying in a bed, attempting to obediently raise her leg with the help of a therapist. 

When Jeanie spotted little Jaime framed in the doorway, she immediately threw on a fake smile and waved him over to her bedside for the heartiest hug she could muster at the time. Granted, not much more than a weak squeeze to his shoulders, but she tried for his sake.

After suffering through physical therapy and then listening to her nephew’s enthusiastic answers to questions about his friends and his favorite teacher at school, the dear lady was exhausted and quietly closed her eyes for just awhile. Mom quietly prodded Jaime to leave with her and let Aunt J rest. 

But instead, Jamie shook his head and with tears in his eyes he told his mom, “Huh-uh, Mom, not yet. Aunt J don’t feel very good. I need to be here, ‘cuz nobody needs to be sick by themself.”

Compassion. Some of us are just simply born with an abundance of that wonderful trait. And some of us are born with other great ones, but not that one. And yet, the Bible speaks of our Creator wanting us to love and care for each other just like we love ourselves. So, if we are not blessed with compassion and empathy from birth, how do we learn it?

Experience is one of the best teachers in this world. A woman who has just had her own baby has a lot more empathy for the pain of the new mom-to-be on her way to the delivery room. An older man who has recently buried his beloved wife understands the heartache of the young husband who stares blankly at the world after losing his young wife and baby in a car accident. 

Compassion and empathy are hard-won gifts for most of us. They are the result of life slamming us up against the wall and us limping away with a lot more heart-knowledge than before. But even though we hate that learning experience, if we allow it, that pain can cause a big growth spurt in us.

Life is hard. But it teaches us to care for each other.